It’s no secret that I’m obsessed with the Duchess of Cambridge. I have been ever since her Kate Middleton days. If I was on Mastermind she would be my specialist subject, and believe me I would ace it. I’d be on fire. They’d probably run out of questions, but that would be okay, because I could fill in the time with some trivia off the top of my head. In the years since the engagement was announced I’ve read every news story (including the ‘news’ stories), blog-post and fashion breakdown about the former Kate Middleton, and I never get bored. I’m as keen for any new piece of information as any Royal Watcher – however, even I, the most ardent of Kate fans, draw the line at a live-cam on the door of the Lindo Wing.
What are we expecting to see?! She’s not even going to go in that way – there are a number of secret entrances and ways for her to get in undetected, as confirmed by the news that she’s been in for appointments and scans, entirely unphotographed.
However, ‘Waity Katie’ is keeping us waiting once again, and in the midst of an intense and oddly seasonal heatwave (well done British weather, you’re right on time for once), it can almost feel as if we’re the pregnant ones (ok – that’s taking it a step too far, but you know what I mean). The waiting is made worse, of course, by the early-announcement of the pregnancy way back in December. Remember December? When you needed to wear a coat? No, me neither – it seems like another world away. The press have been regurgitating the same old no-news stories – how the birth will be announced, Kate’s maternity wear so far, possible names, possible schools, etc – all possible, possible, possible. We have no new news, and we’ll have none until the baby is actually here.
Clarence House have confirmed that when she’s safely settled into a hospital bed, then an announcement will be made. And in due course, all being well, there will be the new-family photo-call on the steps, and maybe that’s the time to watch the live-cam (I know I will be). But, until then, chill your boots. And here are some things to do in the meantime.
1) Donate to Baby Cambridge fundraiser
This is an excellent idea – a fund set up to support one of the Duchess of Cambridge’s favourite charities – East Anglia’s Childrens’ Hospices.
You don’t get through 12 Prime Minsters, 261 overseas visits and 61 years on the throne without developing a sense of perspective. Yes there’s a live camera on a HOSPITAL DOOR, and the world’s press is going mad for the birth of a future monarch, but HM has holiday plans, okay? Visiting Lake Windermere today she reportedly told a child “I would very much like it to arrive, I’m going on holiday”. She’s just ace. See also the Queen’s cousin, Margaret Rhodes, who said she was ‘not terribly excited’ as ‘everyone has babies’. There’s something about the War generation.
3) Laugh at previous media predictions
Twins? Ginger? Ginger twins? Ginger twins called Diana 1 and Diana 2?! Yes, we’re all excited, and with very few actual facts to go on the papers had to print something, but have a browse through any past stories – it’s a good reminder of how little they get right. Guess we’re just going to have to be patient. I know… it’s rubbish.
4) Apply for the Head Housekeeper job at Windsor Castle
My favourite bit starts at 1 minute 55 seconds in. Amazing. There are no words.
7) Read about other Royals
Obviously ours are pretty special – but there are lots of European Royals to choose from. Try Denmark, Sweden, or Spain. At the 2011 Royal Wedding Princess Letizia of Spain was wearing a dress so beautiful she was second only to Kate, and before you ask, yes I’m including Pippa. http://tinyurl.com/qgjwb44 I’m prepared to argue this one.
8) Visit Buckingham Palace
It’s not open to summer visitors until the 27th July (by which time Baby Cambridge will hopefully be here) but if you live in London take advantage of the weather and carry a picnic down to Green Park after work. This is obviously after you’ve taken the obligatory touristy photo outside the gates of Buckingham Palace.
9) Rewatch the Royal Wedding
… or just the highlights. It’s fun to watch even though you know the ending. No, I’m not crying, you’re crying. Shut up.
10) Watch the Coronation Concert
- and see if you can spot a Middleton now and then.